Birthdays are sometimes considered as a unique opportunity to honour and value another year of life, to spend with friends and relatives. Their claimed contents are happiness, laughing, and a feeling of community. Still, occasionally the day deviates from what one expects. My birthday today; as the hours pass, I have not yet gotten any wishes. A sinking sensation in my chest implies I could start to cry.
I had great expectation when I woke up this morning. It seemed like the ideal day to mark my special day—the sun was shining, birds were tweeting. But when I checked my phone, not one message or alert appeared. My social media was quiet, free of the customary torrent of well-wishes usually greeting me on my birthday. I tried to dismiss it, supposing perhaps folks were just busy or hadn’t got around to it yet.
Trying to stay cheerful, I went through my morning ritual. Breakfast was rather less fulfilling without the comfort of birthday greetings to go with it. Every minute that went by felt weighty, as though I was being crushed under the weight of forgetting. The slower-moving clock seemed to heighten my concern and the approaching gloom that threatened to flood over.
Everybody finds various meaning in birthdays. Some find it an opportunity to consider the past year and create future plans. For some, it’s a day to be surrounded by loved ones, to be recognised and appreciated. The notes from friends and relatives, the little actions that make me feel appreciated, excite me. That affirmation is lacking today, hence it can be difficult to avoid disappointment.
Social media has brought us expectations of quick pleasure and ongoing connectedness. On our special days, we are accustomed to a deluge of alerts and messages. When that does not occur, one may easily feel as though we have been forgotten or disregarded. In actuality, though, people have schedules and their own life. They might have momentarily forgot or they might be intending to get in later in the day. It does not always mean they have no interest.
Though logically and emotionally this is different even if one understands this. The quiet seems like a chasm, an absence of love difficult to overlook. I resolved to divert myself by working on something useful. Though the beauty of nature offered a brief solace from my concerns, the underlying melancholy stayed.
The day continued and I began to doubt myself. Was my expectations very high? Was I feeling good about myself depending too much on outside validation? These questions encouraged reflection. I came to see that although having affection and gratitude from others is fantastic, my value should not rely on it. Not only because of my birthday, but also because of who I am and what I offer to the world.
I resolved to rule my day. I choose to celebrate myself rather than waiting for others to make me unique. I watched a movie that always makes me giggle, indulged in some retail therapy, and ate my favourite dinner. I got in touch a close buddy and scheduled a later meeting. By acting in these ways, I was able to refocus from what was lacking to what I could do to improve my day.
As nighttime drew near, I at last got some calls and messages. My friends and relatives apologies for the wait; they explained hectic schedules. They reassured me that I was loved and appreciated even though the day had not started as I had wanted.
When I thought back on the day, I discovered a vital insight. Though they celebrate life, birthdays do not always go as expected. Remember that the amount of birthday greetings we get defines nothing about our value. We can find delight in our own company and start to feel unique.
My birthday thus turned out to be a day of personal development and self-appreciation, even though it did not go as planned. And that alone makes one want celebration.